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figures-of-peach.md

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Figures of Peach

Water under the fridge

Meaning: Refer to events that are in the past and consequently no longer to be regarded as important.

Dates back to when people would drop ice and just kick it under the refrigerator to melt, rather than pick it up.

"Hey, did you drop some ice?" "Yeah. But now it's just water under the fridge."

There's more than one way to spin a cat

Meaning: an alternate solution is available

Dates back to when cats were spun in circles as a means of amusement

Cook two birds with one stove

Meaning: get two things done at once

Dates back to when fuel for stoves and ovens was scarce and more than one meal was cooked at a time

Putting the car before the horn

Meaning: to do something sooner than needed

Dates back to when car horns were located in the trunk, which made them difficult to hear

We're not painting the sixteenth chapel

Meaning: something simple or unnecessary

Dates back to when only fifteen painted chapels were allowed per town

Don’t bite the ham that feeds you

Meaning: to turn against a benefactor or supporter

Dates back to when pork was widely available and other meats were scarce

We’re making money ham over fish

Meaning: quickly, at a great rate

Dates back to when pork was scarce and seafood was widely consumed

Come help, or hire water

Meaning: whatever difficulties may occur

Dates back to when all firefighters were volunteers and water to put out a fire still had to be purchased

Bend over bat turds

Meaning: at great difficulty or expense

Dates back to when they had to scrape guano off cave walls - an arduous task

This is a Nguyen-Nguyen situation

Meaning: when both parties have an advantage

Dates back to when the Nguyen brothers (both of whom are attorneys) would reach an out-of-court settlement when each brother represented a different side of a case

He’s a wolf in cheap clothing

Meaning: something not as it seems

Dates back to when they would dress pet wolves in hand-me-downs to prevent theft

You can't halve your cake and heat it, too

Meaning: You can't have it both ways

Dates back to when people had to choose between halving a whole cake or having a hot cake

We'll burn that British when we get there

Meaning: we'll handle that when it comes up

Dates back to the Revolutionary War when they didn't know when battles would be fought

Three stripes and you’re out

**Meaning: when something is finished after three instances

Dates back to when zooligists were first learning to predict fertility cycles of the zebra

Come down off your pedal stool

Meaning: stop talking as if you were more clever than other people

Dates back to when court jesters would ride around the castle on very tall bicycles dispensing bad advice

To the victim go the spoils

Meaning: benefits taken from the loser in a given competition

Dates back to when dead people would decompose if left alone

You're taking it for granite

Meaning: underestimate the value of something

Dates back to when the value of marble was misunderstood

You’re preaching to require

Meaning: explaining something to someone who already understands it

Dates back to when clergymen had compulsory travel requirements

Strong that broke the camel's back

Meaning: a seemingly action which causes an unpredictably large and sudden reaction

Dates back to when weightlifters would use camels for transportation

You have a huge ship on your shoulder

Meaning: holding a grudge or grievance

Dates back to when distressed sailors would tattoo their arms with large sailing craft to communicate their displeasure

Every road has its thorns

Meaning: something beautiful can be dangerous

Dates back to when people used decorative Roman aqueducts to water their flower gardens

Too big for your bridges

Meaning: take it easy

Dates back to when cars first became wider than roadway lanes on bridge spans

Persona au gratin

Meaning: someone not welcome

Dates back to when anti-Irish sentiments ran high

For all intensive purposes

Meaning: in every practical sense

Dates back to when facts were valued as sources of truth

Tape your pick.

Meaning: choose something or someone

_Dates back to when coal miners marked their personal property with all they had at hand -- typically, this consisted of white marker tape so it could be seen in the dark _

Takes one to no one

Meaning: takes minimal effort

Dates back to when factory workers could do their job without paying complete attention. Often factory workers would joke that their job took a fraction of a person to do, always within the range of 0-1 persons

Takes Juan to know Juan

Meaning: look inward

"Worst session ever", Juan thought as he begrudingly handed his therapist a check

playing double's advocate.

Meaning: second opinion

Dates back to when four-player tennis was controversial

You're making a half-harded effort.

Meaning: not good

Dates back to when masons would attempt to create bricks without properly setting them first

On a reggae bassist

Meaning: steady, trustworthy, constant

Dates back to roots rock and a predictable dub

Choose the farmer or the ladder

Meaning: the first, or the second option

Dates back to when farmhands frequently became stuck on ladders and one had to choose which was most valuable

You're a hare's breath away.

Get the fire distinguisher!

Supply and command.

Always look at the bright sign.

Lots of belts and whistles.

Denial and Error.

My extra-century perception tells me...

In a perfect Ontario...

This has been an exercise in fertility.

Consider this annulled and void.

This is now a mute point.

Just my two sense.

Nip it in the butt.

I’m having chest paints.

Every clown has a silver lining.

I’ve got to go run some errants.

You’re like a bowl in a china shop.

It doesn’t take a couple of rocket appliances to figure this out.

Our office has people from all woks of life.

It’s a doggy-dog world.

I’m being treated like an escape goat.

I have a low shelf of steam.

I won’t be at your beckon call.

He got it all in one fowl swoop.

Two bees in a pod.

Ball’s in your fort.

It’s not a human missile crisis.

Good to glow.

In the grand screen of things it’s going to be ok.

Let’s play to our straits.

Icing on the cape.

Mime over matter.

Paint the town Fred.

It’s a foredrawn conclusion.

It’s not a hardened fast rule.

Lack of resources is creating a huge bottlenet right now.

Designs are a bit peacemeal at the moment.

Six of one, half dozen of a mother.

I could care less

Meaning: having absolutely no regard for a particular topic

Dates back before people understood multiple negatives in a single sentence