Tune memory defaults to better balance the services

[jbeemster]

Currently the memory setup means on the "large" node we end up too memory constrained which can cause contention issues and panics.

We need to benchmark the services and ensure we allocate sufficient memory to the different systems.

Crucially we also need to set a "mem_limit" on each container to ensure that we can avoid noisy neighbor scenarios -> CPU constraints remain but at least memory won't be in competition anymore which should improve stability.