sync-diff: add table match check

[3pointer]

What problem does this PR solve?

close #583

add table match check. when met

1. source exist tables but target not.
2. target exist tables but source not.
   after we use table-filter as parameter.

What is changed and how it works?

add a common check function in source.go

Check List

Tests

• Unit test
• Integration test

Side effects

• Breaking backward compatibility

[ti-chi-bot]

[REVIEW NOTIFICATION]

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• lichunzhu

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[lance6716]

need revert https://github.com/pingcap/ticdc/pull/3413 after this PR

[3pointer]

/hold

wait for 5.3.1

[3pointer]

/unhold

[3pointer]

/merge

[ti-chi-bot]

This pull request has been accepted and is ready to merge.

Commit hash: 641373e